I've been home since the 19th of Dec..and to anyone who I wanted to see but didn't get to, or wanted to see me but my schedule was just foolish, sorry sorry sorry!

I was supposed to go to Cebu to see my Cebu family, but shucks, one month is WAY not enough!

So, am outta here on Sunday :)

I'm excited...am nearly home..

 

 

Things change every day. how many times have we been told in this life that the only thing in life that is constant, is change (well, and death and taxes or something)...

Friction and drama only occurs when you resist change, when you can't let it flow like water off a duck's back..

I was discussing plans with a friend of mine today and the 'ming not having a plan' was something he thought alien, since I always have a plan (well, I do, a general one, not a specific action plan for now..ha ha ha) and he said

'I think people who don't make plans live happier lives'

I disagreed. It's only the anal plans that are too rigid and the people who make these plans that get bent out of shape when things don't go 'according to plan' that have issues, that aren't too happy.

So I said

"hmmm, I don't think so. I think somewhat planned is good, just as long as you are happy with the general plan, and if you don't get all anal when plans change...changing plans are okay, its resisting the change that causes all the drama"

I'm happy. Happier than I have been in 4 years. Marcel said today that I am more relaxed than when I first arrived, i seem more centered, more happy. I am. It wasn't the leaving home or being sick and tired of being home that I needed to get away from. It was the needing quiet time, me time, reflection time..its like going to YE in high school, for that weekend to reflect upon your life..but this one, I had to actually work at the same time (because life doesn't stop when tragedy strikes), but its alright..I had the me time...so now, I'm all good.

Sooo, to you out there, who may be plan free, or over planned, or anally planned. This one's for you.

Life is short, and unless you are Buddhist, you only get one go. Make plans to inspire you, use plans and goals to drive you, but never let them rule your life, and change strategies when you have to..

I'm fulfilled by doing my part in life, how about you?

(ed's note: hay, this is, like clare bear says,  just writing what I think, its not for you specifically, but if it hits you, well maybe it is for you..but I'm just talking to myself really)

You have to admit..that sometimes, timing can be everything.

I learned a few years back, that you need to have a few things aligned to create a window of opportunity. This works both for work and for life in general.

Many years ago (vague obviously for a reason) I met this guy. I was in a slightly complicated stage in my life (well, more confused than complicated). He, on the other hand, was in a MORE complicated/confused state. A recipe for disaster.

The thing is it was  all good.. Good friends, good times, good vibes, good laughs....

I have to say that if we were in a more lucid state, we would have either recognized the state of it all and maintained the friendship only, or taken it to a more steady level..but as timing had it..after all the dust settled, we had nothing, just a chasm and 'common' friends.

Within the past X years, we've seen each other here and there, exchanging quick hellos to keep up appearances, but anyone who knew us, must have noticed the change in status..and I have to say I felt the difference, and I would imagine he would have too. I'm sure he must have felt the fact that one of his best friends became mine too, possibly from his point of view, replacing him..but that wasn't the case. I'm thankful that I met one through the other, but one surely doesn't equal the other...

I was angry for a time..because I felt gypped out of my friendship but after 4 years (and heavy discussions with significant others) i was already at the stage where I thought it was time to mend fences..but the opportunity wasn't there, and the timing was never right.

Life has been chaotic for the past few years..but things had started to settle again, and I was somewhat out of my 'cloud'

And so, recently, a window of opportunity presented itself, and it seemed, for both of us, the timing was right.

When I first got there I was wondering if we'd be able to sort things out this time round..I was there, he was there, with our friends. We said hello and I *think* he gave me a hug...We had dinner, we hit the town and went to some funky bars then we all had breakfast together. A few days later we also all had lunch, and what I thought might have been a one day fluke, wasn't. I figured, yeah, maybe we were okay again.

What really hit home with me was when he (and ofcourse his/my best friend) came over the night before I left (or was it two nights before?)..which was signature him, since the last time we were 'friends' he stayed til the sun came up, half asleep, talking and laughing.

At long last, we were friends again.

We didn't really talk about this until last week, when he saw me on ym, and said something about putting me in his little black book (he was asking for my details) and i said that I had already made it into that book..didn't I?

He asked if I had regrets, and I said no. Regrets about what? Us being friends? not at all. About the good steady friendship that we had? No way. About all the other things that complicated the already complicated situation? No.

Life is all about living and I have no regrets. He was (is) the best of friends...he would drive hours to come get me, and drive hours back to take me home. Everything was funny and he is one of the sweetest guys I have ever met in my life...

He apologized profusely, and I told him that there is nothing to say sorry about anymore...

You know how they say that time heals all wounds? It's not true. Though time is a factor, there are many other factors that you need to put in place to create your own window of opportunity...and forgiving yourself is one of those things as  is forgiving other people.

We are only human.

And knowing all these things, talking about it to settle the issues and regaining my center?

Well, somehow, all that happened last week, and that, my friends, is timing.

 

Yes, yes, I know..so is love, but I guess you know its the love for football that can truly unite.

I have another game today, had one the other day, against Gnommalath Neua (Village)..our office has joined a tournament and yes...yes, yes, we play on the kamikaze field!

the other day, when we played, it wasn't as kamikaze as there was no poo, but funky,...imagine the lines, instead of chalk, was sawdust! Siempre I didnt see it, and was playing right wing mid, and had to be told by the opposing team infront of me, to 'step behind' the line before the kick off..I didn't even know what he was meaning til I saw this distinct like of sawdust!! The things you do to just play football! Not only that, this is the first time I have played in total puddle rain! no basic rain, basic puddles, this is typhoon material!

So yeah, this is my first time to play in an ALL BOY LEAGUE! I am the token girl, white girl at that, but you know, after our first game (which we won three nil) my team mates were all happy and shaking each others hands, and then our captain spoke and some other people spoke and looked to me and started saying more stuff (in Lao, siempre..hirap!), so i looked to Pem to explain..and he said 'they say they respect you..you can play'..

I have to give my million thanks to my boys, starting from my high school friends (Lozano et al) --and ofcourse my Coach, Tomas..to Coach Hans/Lozzy and his bro (for letting me train with Kaya during my getting back to fitness year) to Deone and all the places he took me to play ...to all of you who let me play, even if I was the only girl at times.. :P

And ofcourse, to all us girls who actually play like boys..moments like these are absolutely priceless, for everything else (like coming to visit me and showing them boys there are more of us out there)..there is master card!!

Link

 

I was asked by Clare to post this on my own page..

Thanks so much for the happy thoughts Bear :) 

Fuck. 7 days til I turn 32 and why, WHY do I watch Grey's Fucking Anatomy?

Well, I don't think it has anything to do with my looming birthday, but more with I am just obsessed..with what? Well, he he he, I'm not gonna post that here! He he he..

One of the millions of lines that those writers put intentionally to hook people like me (edgy, supposedly angsty, hopeful romantic-y, twisted, supposedly complicated) is the "You are the one person I wanted to tell". This is when Meredith comes back to life and Cristina is telling her that she is about to get married.

You are the one person I wanted to tell. And I thought about my one person. (siempre..thats the whole point if you watch the same series the second time round, you internalize..ha ha ha) And I thought about my one person and missed her like something seriously chronic.

About six months ago, or less, I went to Vientiane.

I was there for business, not really up to meeting anyone new, but I did and me meeting him reminded me that life is too short not to be passionate about life and that there are good guys out there..somewhere.

And now, its my second visit. I was a little hesitant, knowing that the last time I was here I met that Tyler.. But you know..I was hesitant because I didn't want to change the good vibes I got from that night, change it with new ones..i just thought it would be unfair to the memory..

But I had to, to get my passport, to get my cheque, to take a break, to do some seriously seriously needed shopping.

I had intended to have a quiet night, not meet people..not be an extrovert..hay..plans change!

I met this guy (who thought he was killer hot, as in. Well, in fairness, he kinda was..but yuh, his teeth were medjo too european for me--as in..basta, if you know what i mean, YOu KNOW what I mean!) but he was nice...medjo pa feeling pero k lang..but as I ate there at the Scandanavian Bakery, he made pa eye contact eye contact, and I gave in and talked to him..which is good because 3 other people, two girls and one boy, and introduced themselves to us, and that, is how you make, a random group.

We had dinner together, we talked about ourselves..we did the whole introducing thing during dinner, telling each other things that you wouldn't even tell some friends (I mean not close friends ah, as in friends friends) and these are strangers!

But you know, I had fun.. On day 2 Bec, Dominik and I, we went shopping together, we went clubbing together the night before, and then we had dinner together! We had steak and chips..yum.

On day 3 I played football with Dominik (Austrian) and Tommy (Israeli) and had dinner at Marcel's because they were having a housewarming.

I got my first dose of cultural differences that night..as I sat down next to these two girls that I got introduced to earlier, these two other said something in laotian and then they all giggled (ahh women) and so I said, sorry what?

She said " Tai said us three sit together is a good thing, we all the same, we all fat"

and I said "WHAT?" (keep in mind, I have just met ALL these people 20 mins earlier)

and she said "Fat, you know, chubby"

Okay, yes, I am not slim, not thin, not svelte and no, I will never be thai/lao thin. But talk about cultural difference, NEVER will you have a stranger (unless drunk or demented) in Manila to say "hang out with them y'all match, y'all fat!" ha ha ha

Luckily I don't mind..i asked marcel later on and he said yeah, they don't have that sensitivity issue with weight here..god forbid!

But yeah, Vientiane ver 2.0 didn't go so badly.

Marcel picked me up on his motorbike (little does he know this scares the fuck out of me) and took me to the party and I got to hang out and meet new people...i loved it :)

Oh, and I got to shop. I was having shoppers anxiety na not being able to shop for 3 weeks, I bought a scarf and skirt! he he he oh and football shoes and socks..anyway, til the next photo op! Saturday!

 

 

I'm suchhh a nerd.

Check this out: http://www.crc.uri.edu/download/Entire_Book.pdf

page 110. Kating, you and jumbo have special mention pa!--its the one I was telling you about.

Hugs baby!

I am a seafarer. I love to be on boats, big and small. I love to sit at the beach and watch the waves. The blue sea is home. It makes me feel safe, one with nature. When it is angry, I feel in awe of the sheer strength of the waves, large enough to crush the sturdiest of vessels that man attempts to make seaworthy and safe, but when the sea is angry, it knows no friends, no one is spared from its strength. I love to feel the cool sea water on my feet, the sun on my face, the scent of the ocean, overwhelming my senses. The ocean has so many hues of blue. I can't claim to have seen all its colours but I have seen many, from azure to sapphire, I have even seen it green (hmm and brown, in mangroves). As you can see, I love the sea. It is blue. And blue will forever remind me of the sea.

I also like Red and Orange, the colour of a sunny sun, peeking out of the clouds, warming the skin after a cool dive.

Everything I love in colours has some relation to the sea.

But again, I am in awe. I recently realized, well, I don't mind green either.

Mountains and hills and grasslands and forests..I have always liked the forest but being in this rural setting has made me appreciate the different hues of green, and how the sun reflects off the mist or the grass, or the rice paddies..Higher up in the mountains, the green is a dark, nearly british racing green and as it comes down the slope the green gets lighter until you are now looking at the light green of the rice fields, all in a row, in organized o.c. rows.

So who wins? Blue or Green?

The only, I will use the word problem, but its not really a problem..anyway..The only problem with going away and finding some peace for your soul and for your mind to defrag* is that you also have a lot time to think and evaluate your life. Well, then again, that is the point. The way to defrag is to sift through thoughts and experiences and organize them into little box folders in your brain, methodically punching holes and placing the pages in ring binders, putting headers like ‘don’t do THAT again’ or ‘Emergency Happy Thoughts’ on the outside for easy referencing.

 

Okay, yeah yeah I know..this isn’t how its done, but I like to think that this is the way my mind does it (because I am so OC when it comes to notes and periodicals)..

 

Anyway…

 

My day is full, every day. I wake at 6:40 which is no easy feat for me and am ready by 7:05 every day. I ride down the escarpment to my office, the beautiful morning ride takes about half an hour. On the way down while watching the scenery which differs daily (more mist, less mist, more green, less green, more blue sky today, dark moody sky tomorrow) while talking to Marcel on whatever the topic of the morning is (today it was about diving and holidays). Eat breakfast at the office and start work at 8. Work til 12 (with some surfing breaks, obviously), lunch at 12 either at RNT, the French camp, or here at the office with the local staff. (ahh, the food, yet another blog entry waiting to happen), then lunch break for half an hour of sitting around chatting and checking email. I should end work at 5 but I usually work til about 5:30, or whenever Marcel asks if I am ready to go and play badminton. We play badminton until I see the futsal people show up and then I ditch Marcel to go play futsal with boys who are now finally accepting me as a boy (I now get shoved and kicked in the shins like any other player), then go back to Marcel to have a last round of badminton. Then we end this all around 8 or so, then dinner, either at the EM-1 camp, RNT or the Vietnam Road down here in Gnommalath. Or sometimes we go up a little early, back to Nakai and get dropped off at the Environment complex to eat with the other E&S staff, then walk back to our camp..half an hour walk. Again, walking, not one of my finer qualities!

 

So yeah, full full day from waking to bedtime..but you know, its killer stress free. My main issue yesterday is if I could buy yoghurt and if it would keep long enough before I get it to my fridge! So, this means that I have some pockets of time to think and my stress free mind is defragging continuously.

 

Which takes me back to my problem of evaluation. (see, the word issue doesn’t fit either..I guess I could call it a thing)…back to my thing about evaluation..

 

The normal questions ofcourse are:

How am I? What am I doing? Is everything alright? What else do I have to do? Do I have a good plan? Am I flexible enough? How do I treat the people around me? Am I a good person?

 

Then ofcourse, with the extra space from the lack of stress you also think:

Where am I now in my life, is this where I want to be?

Why things do happen to you when they do and what is the best way of handling things?

Have I handled things that have happened to me in the best way possible?

What do I like or not like about myself?

Are you really alright?

 

You see where I am going with this yeah? I mean, I am not one to avoid confrontation, especially when it’s the healthy sort, but it can still be daunting and overwhelming!

 

The hardest part is you are looking at all of this in the harsh light of self evaluation, the most critical critic, the most difficult person to please, yourself.

 

And this is where that grain of salt (or sugar) should come in (that comes out of your ‘Emergency Happy Thoughts” box)

 

I have a great family who are supportive and real. I have extremely supportive parents (somewhat overprotective, but such is life) and my immediate family (neices, nephews, cousins and siblings) are not only family, but also my friends.

 

I have many friends and I have a good diverse set of really good friends and I have my handful of people I would trust my life with, the circle of trust.

 

I have a good fulfilling job that helps me help the world (Go PLANET!) and lets me afford my lifestyle (eek!)

 

I’m nearly at the stage where I can say I am reasonably happy with how I look, no matter how many times you compare me against Naomi (ha ha ha, the poor nurse Nomes!)

 

I may be single, but life is good and if the right person who loves me comes, then he will. And if he doesn’t, well, I’ll just have kids :P

 

I’m a decent person who can be too nice, but then again, I can be quite a bitch, healthy combination.

 

Hmmm. I think I have just cheered myself up.

 

I guess the moral of the story is, you should know (normally) that your worst critic is yourself and that life is too short to be that harsh on yourself… live life responsibly, love life with passion and have a drink to celebrate!

 

*defrag- defragment: computer term that sorts through your files and reorganizes them and takes a look at the bad sectors and then reports back to you the status

I haven't seen the movie lost in translation yet. But I'll use the title anyway for my purposes (as in not a male/female lost in translation moment, but a real language barrier issue)..

OBVIOUSLY, I won't understand a word they say here..and even more unlikely, in rural Laos will the villagers or even some of my office mates, understand what I say..but ofcourse..this has nothing to do with the lack of trying.

Let me start with this. Five minutes ago, I went to tell the Admin guy that I needed a car to get to Thakek from Gnommalath for a meeting..well, just my luck he's out but the admin girl is in the office..now Mr. Kim's english isn't bad at all, but well, the girl (who's name is Inpone i think) I have NO IDEA if she speaks english..So she said "Yes?' as I opened the door and I said "Oh Mr. Kim not here?" and she said "Yes"..and then she gave me this what do you need look, so I said, "I need car tomorrow, go thakek and come back" and she said "Yes" and so I said can 'you organize it?" and she said "Yes, I fix car for you". Then we both laughed at each other wondering if we understood each other right.

Now, see, I can walk away assuming she got my request right, but her saying the golden words of I can fix car for you means shit. Because it could mean that she fixes it but with no idea what for because she can't ask me what I just said (ooh, as I type I see Mr. Kim is back in! must make sure its fixed!)

It was just comedy, and trust me, this happens to me on a daily basis here! Especially when I know the guy has no idea what I'm saying, I usually end my sentence with 'and I am sure you have no idea what I just said so me speaking means nothing!' he he he

And then..well, yesterday, I played football..and though we see football as a universal language..well, keep in mind that:

a) I am female

b) I am in rural Laos and

c) I don't speak the language

So, I walk to th field with Mr. Kim (who organised it all) and he walks away from me to talk to other people..and a group of people (our opponents, high school kids, us oldies from the project lands office) walked to our area and ofcourse, looked at me funny, and then started laughing and talking in lao, obviously about me (no, they didn't point but they did all look at me and laugh)..ahh, the universal football boys language of 'a girl!??' and then, as it does, they fell silent, and two of the boys came up to me and said "Hello Hello Sabaidee, Good Afternoon" each putting out thier hand to shake mine in turn. And once they were both done, the other boys started laughing.

Luckily I am used to playing with all boys, usually skeptical at first, and ofcourse being subjected to funny hellos and such are just par for the course when you go to foreign countries!

But anyway, the game was funny too because the field was not mowed and there were parts that you couldn't see the ball once it hit the grass and there were serious puddles all over the freakin place, like I'm not talking ball skid, I'm talking ball stops in place and spraying water as you kick it! And there were grassless parts that was just all red clay mud..though I have to say, it was better than the PUP field I played at in college where there was broken glass and nails! Ha ha ha, but it was fun and it was good because I did get passed to at times  (no dee, I wasn't playing killer olats, my passes were good!) so here I am hoping that they'll ask me to play again.

 

Yesterday I met someone who used to make less than ten dollars a month. He worked for a hotel in Vientiane where he made 60,000 kip per month, half of which he spent on English lessons so that he could get better jobs.

 

He may be making more money now, now that he works for the NTPC project as a driver..hopefully a lot more but I wasn’t willing to ask him how much he makes now because then he might ask me how much I make and that would just be embarrassing.

 

See that? He spent HALF his meager earnings on his plan to make life better. He didn’t just sit at home and hope for the best. He didn’t rely on someone else to fix it for him.

 

This thought just brought me back to people (I know) who choose to do nothing when there are people in the world who have no choice.

 

Yesterday also I bought some groceries (some juice, three eggs, dishwashing liquid, tuna, onions and a few other things) and it cost me 200,000 kip. (exchange rate is 1 USD to 9300 kip) I spent 20 dollars. He makes less than half of what I spent in 20 mins in ONE MONTH.

 

This is not a sermon or a litany on the haves and have nots. I’m not saying feel guilty about the good things we have in life. I too, buy expensive shoes, jeans and whatever else that I spend my money on, but I work hard for it, like most people do.

 

But what you should do is be grateful and thankful for the blessings, and when you can, give back. It doesn’t have to be money, it can be old clothes, it can be food, or even just your time.

 

The half way point of the Millennium Development Goals is today, July 7, 2007.  Read this if you have some time :  http://www.economist.com/displaystory.cfm?story_id=9440765

 

And if you want to get involved somehow, check out RockEd Philippines.

<img src="http://www.world66.com/community/mymaps/worldmap?visited=USMGBEFRDEITESUKVABNCNIDJPLAMYPHSGTHAU"><br/>
<a href="http://douweosinga.com/projects/visitedcountries">create your own visited countries map</a>
 or <a href="http://www.tonjafabritz.com">vertaling Duits Nederlands</a>

I'm not good with death.

I mean, I'm good in the sense that I seriously believe that there is a God and if you have faith and repent and all that, you will go to heaven, but I have a bad case of separation anxiety.  

I have this specialist consultant, his name is Pete Alviola. We call him Prof, Prof A, Sir Pete and Prof Alviola. We always crack jokes that he could name that bird in one squawk because he is one hell of a terrestrial biologist. I'm absolutely serious. He knows things just looking at the nest! One time, he just looked up, raised an ear and named the bird, giving off his text book line up of habitat, feeding regime, reproductive habits and basic identification features! He also does flora, and can rattle off tree names, species, usual diseases of the trees, usual healing qualities of the bark or leaves...man this guy is unbelieveable.

I went to BRunei with him for my first project here in Halcrow. I was organizer, lunch payer, driver, hotel peace keeper..my room was the meeting room, beer room and eating room. I bonded with my consultants because we were there for 14 days doing an EIA.

One day I had only one car and had to drop people off here and there and find a boat to rent for oceanography (without using myself as partial payment, much to Sir K's discussion with the Brunei man's dismay)..and I had to leave Sir Pete out in the woods with only a bottle of water..the dialogue went like this:

MFO: SIr, I have to leave you here, sorry ha, I have to go get the boat eh..will you be okay?

PA: Ofcourse! Okay lang yan! Relax ka lang! Its Good! Okay lang yan!

MFO: But Sir, you have no food, water lang, sorry talaga!

PA: I have sky flakes here in my bag and some hopia, don't worry! Okay lang yan!

I think he told me not to worry all the time. I'm such a worry wart. Trying to handle 12 consultants at once is no easy task, but he made it much lighter with his easy banter and good natured attitude.. I've worked with him on many projects, he is one of my favourite specialists.

He was so old school too. He submitted his reports on floppy disks and on yellow pad..he's just so cute its unbelieveable.

One time I thought I lost him when I sent him to Brunei alone. I didn't want to call his wife and alarm her, but I had to after a while. Even she told me to relax and that he was probably already there, and lo and behold, she was right.

Sir Pete passed away yesterday. He was on his motorbike in LB to buy some basics for the house and his bike was side swiped. He seemed uninjured and was even lucid for an hour, but then fell into a coma at the hospital because he sustained internal injuries.

He will be sorely missed and I hope I can get all my friends to pray for his soul.

He was a GREAT biologist. One of the best in the Philippines. He was a GREAT consultant, as he submitted things on time and in killer detail. He was an EXTREMELY Iintelligent man who knew many things, even not related to his work. He was an EXTREMELY kind man, who helped me see that I shouldn't worry so much and things will be fine.

He was a good person with a kind heart.

Professor Pedro Alviola III, my terrestrial biologist.

I'm part of a group called Rock-Ed, and instead of me trying to explain what it is we do and what we stand for, let me direct you to Gang's page because she explains it perfectly.

sumandali.blogspot.com

but usual ming style, I still have something to say..

In one way or another, we are all sick and tired of the status quo, sick and tired of the potholes in the road, and sick and f*cking tired of people that get away with stealing, lying and all the other bad things we shouldn't let them get away with....

 But you know, we are still lucky, because we have the luxury to complain without actually feeling the hardship and life that millions of other people feel. We complain in the comfort of our airconditioned car or sitting around Starbucks, drinking our hot coffees and fraps..I'm not ridiculing you, because I complain in this comfort state too, but as you can see in my blogs and when you talk to me, I've made my choice, and that is to make no more excuses and to act and move somehow to make poverty history. I do this through environmental advocacy, through environmental awareness campaigns and by telling my friends everything I can about conservation. (and also thru futkal! support futkal!)

Now the choice is yours..in this time of environmental change (for the worse!), political turmoil, developed, developing and less developed country categories (how fucking politically correct is that!??)..

we are no longer homo sapiens, we are now homo economicus, homo urbanicus (or something, read this somewhere, economist ata)..we have evolved, but have we evolved for the better?

Again, the choice is yours, what are you going to do to help change the world?

 

 

greetings!
>
> we're very sorry for the short notice  but
> everything was  finalized only yesterday. we hope
> that you guys could still join.
>
> the tournament will MAINLY be a fund raiser for the
> family of coach hans as they lost their belongings and home in a recent fire..

>
> the tournament will be on Saturday May 19, 2007 in
> La Salle Zobel gym

1. the tournament will be half
> day for ladies open and half day for mens open.
>
> LADIES OPEN: registration will start at 7am and the
> tournament will be from 8am to 1pm.
> MENS OPEN: registration will start at 12pm and the
> tournament will be from 1pm till everything is
> finished.
>
> registration fee is php1500 per team. 7 players per
> team. pls invite as much teams as you can
>
> this tournament will be knock out style. if you lose
> your out. we are sorry that the format of the
> tournament is like this but again our main purpose
> is to help through playing for a cause.
>
> this will be a futsal tournament. 10-15minits per
> half depending on the number of teams that will show
> up.
>
> we really hope that you guys join the tournament and
> help out. thank you for you time and again we are
> sorry for the late notice. if you have any questions
> pls email to pagong915@yahoo.com
>

I've given it much thought, and have been bribed in different ways to change my mind. From mere guilt trips to offers of loan disregard to a very inticing payment of my PhD but, I have decided, for at least the next six months from July, that its time for me to move on.

Unlikely that its forever, and I will probably be home more often that I think, but I need the development work to fuel the drive that I have in conservation and development, I need the cash (ha ha ha ) to sustain my bad habits and to save at long last, and..quite importantly, I need the space.

I am a nomad by nature, waiting for the time when I would be gently coerced into settling, not down but just settling in place..not stationary but steady.

one day, and as tancio said, it will all fall into place.

I'm sure you've read enough about the elections, either in blogs or on the news...but I just wanted to put my two cents out too since I don't really want to deal with my other more pressing issues.

So here we are, a few days away..gun bans and rally bans or whaterver..with the more idealistic visionary group of people hoping for change and the other more weathered, jaded and mercenary others hoping to keep the status quo so that they can continue making dirty money off of other people's backs.

We wonder why there is no progress, its because we are all, at one time or another, guilty of perpetuating the cycle...by paying off the police man, by avoiding some tax, by buying foreign equivalents of local products, by not investing in our country and in our people.

We talk about the desire to change, but in most cases its all talk and no action. We talk about the desire to better, strive for more, but its usually the beer talking.

Anyway, enough ranting and raving. I'm here to give you my list. My list of people that I've only met two of on the list personally but I'm not about to say that I know them well enough to say they will do us no harm (but they did seem quite capable)..but from my limited point of view (because campaigns seem to be based on popularity and name recall as opposed to REAL panel discussions and platforms)..these are the mix of people i suggest we put into position, hold our breaths and hope for the best.

Trillianes, Escudero, Pimentel, Roco, B. Aquino, Zubiri, Cayetano, Lacson, Pangilinan, Bautista, Paredes, Sison

I make no excuses nor do I give paragraphs of reasons why this is my list. I just hope that my list wins and that if they do, they do the job they are supposed to.

damn, now I'm done so I have to think about my other stuff again.

Its been confirmed, the topamax has made me an airhead, and my other drug, duprixil or something, is a cerebral oxygenator, which literally means airhead..ha ha ha

Well, today, Nomes and I went to the docs to get all my results and they are all good so thanks to everyone who said a little prayer for me. But Naomi got to experience Malibu Ming first hand.

First of all, I lost my lisensha. Not lost as in nawala, lost as in mr pulis took it! I turned right on pasay road to paseo and it was a filter light but I thought it was green, oh well..so the drugs, well, they help me care a little less, so I gave it to the powlice who heed and hawed a little, expecting me to negotiate (which I wouldn't anyway, but I would usually try to sweet talk), well not today. I went on joking with nomes about how I was getting a ticket for a misbehaving (the violation is disobedience!)

And then we went to Honda to look at a Jazz, and the security tried to give me grief, but I just let it go,  no argument, no flack, nothing..Naomi said she felt like she was in the twilight zone..

But alas, I have requested to be taken off the drugs, so tonight, Malibu Ming says good night, adieu and good bye..so this is my last airhead blog *god forbid, hopefully ever!*